Thanksgiving

"Thanksgiving"
a collection of quotes

edited by Jake Kilroy

AN EXCERPT:
Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.
- Johnny Carson

Thanksgiving Day comes, by statute, once a year; to the honest man it comes as frequently as the heart of gratitude will allow.
- Edward Sandford Martin

Thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action.
- W.J. Cameron

Thanksgiving Day, a function which originated in New England two or three centuries ago when those people recognized that they really had something to be thankful for, annually, not oftener, if they had succeeded in exterminating their neighbors, the Indians, during the previous twelve months instead of getting exterminated by their neighbors, the Indians. Thanksgiving Day became a habit, for the reason that in the course of time, as the years drifted on, it was perceived that the exterminating had ceased to be mutual and was all on the white man's side, consequently on the Lord's side; hence it was proper to thank the Lord for it and extend the usual annual compliments.
- Mark Twain

Thanksgiving was never meant to be shut up in a single day.
- Robert Caspar Lintner

An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
- Irv Kupcinet

There is one day that is ours. There is one day when all we Americans who are not self-made go back to the old home to eat saleratus biscuits and marvel how much nearer to the porch the old pump looks than it used to. Thanksgiving Day is the one day that is purely American.
- O. Henry

On Thanksgiving Day we acknowledge our dependence.
- William Jennings Bryan

Thanksgiving is America's national chow-down feast, the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty.
- Michael Dresser

I love Thanksgiving turkey. It's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.
- Arnold Schwarzenegger

Happy We-Stole-Your-Land-and-Killed-Your-People Day!
- Al, from the film "Sweet November"