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"At The End Of The Day"
a novella
by Jake Kilroy
AN EXCERPT:
He grabbed his suede jacket and stepped out the back door of the restaurant, hurrying to the car, concentrating on each planted move of his feet. The parking lot had been empty for an hour, long since the neon sign died.
She yelled again, this time from the doorway. "I get it. I broke your heart three years ago and this is your way of getting back at me. I come back here because I need money, but you see right through me. I'm here to ruin your life again. You got me. I'm back to hurt you. I fooled everybody else, but not you. You know that even though I'm about to get married, I'm here to cut you open again."
She waited for him to catch fire, while he waited to gather himself. He stood at his driver's side door with keys in hand. His eyes were closed and his hands were gripping the keys so hard that the metal should have melted.
He spun around. "What do you want from me?" he yelled back at her, moving towards her quickly. "What could you possibly want? You want a goodbye? You leave town for three years and come back one night and demand a goodbye? Who are you? Who do you think you are? Why do you think you deserve for everyone to be nice to you? When have you ever benefited someone where you weren't the one benefited first? I'd love to hear this."
"Oh, you're so right. I always try to put myself first. Now, why am I here again? Oh right, because my fiancé and I need money for our wedding. Could I have asked my sexually abusive father? Sure. Why not? That would have been easy. Give him some and he'll give me some. Then I could walk away clean, walk away without this between us, whatever you want to call it. I'd call it a big fucking gap, but you'll probably just call it my fault again."
"Still the same girl. The only way you've evolved is that your tits got bigger, and I'm just going to assume that the boob job is the reason you need money again. I wouldn't put cocaine pass you, but really, with your sharp mouth and low self-esteem, who knows what you'll say no to?"
"Fuck you. I came here to be fine with you. I thought maybe you'd be an adult. I can't imagine why I'd assume that. The only way you'd open up to me is if I broke your rib cage. And I'll put the fall of us three years ago on that, while you put it on me being with someone else."
"Someone else in front of me. You forget that it was in front of me."
"Whatever. I was drunk and it was my birthday anyway. It didn't matter. We were dead long before then. You just love technicalities."
"Not as much as you love humping on a pool table in front of your friends. I can't imagine what Christmas is like with you. I'm sure both you and the turkey have a ball getting stuffed together in front of everyone who used to respect you."
"Oh, that was beautiful. Have you been waiting to say that to me for three years? Kind of lacking there. I won't complain though. I never have with you, not even about the sex."
"Why would you complain to me? I wasn't even a part of it. Remember? It was you and the jock model on the pool table. You must remember. I mean, you were just talking about it and it was also the night everyone started calling you a slut."
"First of all, we were just groping. Secondly, I think the best part about dating you was your wit, because it certainly wasn't your punctuality or generosity."
"Wow, I'm impressed with your new vocabulary. College does wonders. When we last saw each other, you hadn't learned the word 'sorry' yet. But, that's ok, you've never been a quick learner."
She yelled again, this time from the doorway. "I get it. I broke your heart three years ago and this is your way of getting back at me. I come back here because I need money, but you see right through me. I'm here to ruin your life again. You got me. I'm back to hurt you. I fooled everybody else, but not you. You know that even though I'm about to get married, I'm here to cut you open again."
She waited for him to catch fire, while he waited to gather himself. He stood at his driver's side door with keys in hand. His eyes were closed and his hands were gripping the keys so hard that the metal should have melted.
He spun around. "What do you want from me?" he yelled back at her, moving towards her quickly. "What could you possibly want? You want a goodbye? You leave town for three years and come back one night and demand a goodbye? Who are you? Who do you think you are? Why do you think you deserve for everyone to be nice to you? When have you ever benefited someone where you weren't the one benefited first? I'd love to hear this."
"Oh, you're so right. I always try to put myself first. Now, why am I here again? Oh right, because my fiancé and I need money for our wedding. Could I have asked my sexually abusive father? Sure. Why not? That would have been easy. Give him some and he'll give me some. Then I could walk away clean, walk away without this between us, whatever you want to call it. I'd call it a big fucking gap, but you'll probably just call it my fault again."
"Still the same girl. The only way you've evolved is that your tits got bigger, and I'm just going to assume that the boob job is the reason you need money again. I wouldn't put cocaine pass you, but really, with your sharp mouth and low self-esteem, who knows what you'll say no to?"
"Fuck you. I came here to be fine with you. I thought maybe you'd be an adult. I can't imagine why I'd assume that. The only way you'd open up to me is if I broke your rib cage. And I'll put the fall of us three years ago on that, while you put it on me being with someone else."
"Someone else in front of me. You forget that it was in front of me."
"Whatever. I was drunk and it was my birthday anyway. It didn't matter. We were dead long before then. You just love technicalities."
"Not as much as you love humping on a pool table in front of your friends. I can't imagine what Christmas is like with you. I'm sure both you and the turkey have a ball getting stuffed together in front of everyone who used to respect you."
"Oh, that was beautiful. Have you been waiting to say that to me for three years? Kind of lacking there. I won't complain though. I never have with you, not even about the sex."
"Why would you complain to me? I wasn't even a part of it. Remember? It was you and the jock model on the pool table. You must remember. I mean, you were just talking about it and it was also the night everyone started calling you a slut."
"First of all, we were just groping. Secondly, I think the best part about dating you was your wit, because it certainly wasn't your punctuality or generosity."
"Wow, I'm impressed with your new vocabulary. College does wonders. When we last saw each other, you hadn't learned the word 'sorry' yet. But, that's ok, you've never been a quick learner."
"You'd be done with a girl in the sack faster than I could even say the word 'sorry'."
"Oh, I know. You're a ridiculously slow learner. Remember how long it took you to try and stay loyal? Actually, are you even there yet? Because if you are, I could call all the guys you've fucked and we could throw a big celebration right here in the parking lot."
"Or we could call all the girls you've fucked and I could just stand right here clapping for myself for an hour."
He actually laughed. "I've missed that mouth of yours. No joke. No insult. I miss that sharp wit of yours."
She sighed heavily, "I'll admit it. I've missed you, too."
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